Death is not Dying

Today, on the Desiring God blog, I was directed to THIS AUDIO and THIS VIDEO  by Rachel.  I tried watching the video, but it wouldn't run smoothly, so I decided to listen to the audio.  The audio is approximately 55 minutes long, but I'll tell you what, Rachel presents the gospel in the face of death in a way that is both beautiful and powerful.  

After four and a half years of vigilantly fighting breast cancer, Rachel Barkey, a 37 year old wife and mother of two, was diagnosed with terminal cancer.  But for Rachel, the essence of life is found in her relationship with God through Jesus. And that's why Rachel is convinced that death is not dying.

You will not be sorry for giving an hour of your time to listen to her speech.  It reminds me in some ways of The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch because Rachel hopes that someday her children will watch the video to know what she believed in and lived for.   She gave this talk at a women's event for her church, and I am sure each one left the evening with a changed perspective. 

Please remember to pray for Rachel, as well as the many other people that I am sure, like me, you know who have cancer.

Time Out

I don't usually talk much about Dave's sermons because that seems a little self-indulgent and prideful, but I have to recommend that you listen to THIS MESSAGE.  One of the things about having a pastor as a husband is that I often think that my husband takes everything he'd like to say to me and turns it into a sermon, just for me!  See, on Sundays, Dave isn't speaking with you in mind, you just get to benefit from what I need to be learning in life!  ;-)  This isn't true, of course, but God does speak to me through what Dave teaches, and I need that.

Anyway, I was gone last weekend at the women's retreat (which was fabulous - thank you retreat team!), so I missed his sermon, but I knew it was one that I HAD to listen to.  I think it is sad that so many of us women missed this particular message because it's a good one!  Please take a few minutes to listen to THIS (titled "Time Out"), and take Dave's challenge to try this concept out for the next four weeks to see what happens.   

I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Fabulous Friday and a Winner

Even though I've just completed two in-service days at my school site, today has been a great day! I was able to complete the work assigned to us much more quickly than I thought possible. We are revising and updating our course of study curriculum guides for each class, and of course, English covers a lot of territory in different areas: literature, writing, grammar, and vocabulary development. After finishing my course of study guides, I realized again just how much we cover in one year. Sometimes I feel as if we're not making much progress, but over time, we continue to add to our base of knowledge in many areas. I am continually praying that the Lord will miraculously fill in all the gaps, as it is impossible to accommodate all the various learning levels when there are 32 students in a class.

This morning, I spoke with a colleague as we poured ourselves a cup of coffee (always a necessity on in-service days!). This humble young woman oozes the love and spirit of Jesus, and I find myself wanting to be more like Him when I am around her. It was just the two of us in the teacher's room, and as we were finishing up, she suggested we pray for one another. We shared such a sweet time of connecting with God and one another, and I was blessed. It can sometimes seem as if we are all working independently with no real support, but this morning we were supporting one another in prayer, and it made a difference in the rest of my work day. Thank you, dear one, for being a blessing in my life.

Well, my post about leaving a comment so I would know who is reading didn't go so well. There are those of you who have told me you are out there, but you don't want to leave a comment. That's fine, but you weren't entered in the drawing, thus making the odds better for those who did leave a comment. :-) (You know that's a joke, right?!) I wrote down everyone's name who emailed, left a comment, or sent a snail-mail card, and I had my daughter, Hannah, draw one for me. I know there are many fancy bloggers who use a random number generator for their drawings, but I'm not that technically savvy, so I used the old fashioned method of drawing out of a hat (well, make that a bowl).

And the winner is....................Cindi!!! :-)

Yes, she will be receiving a Starbucks gift card, and I think I'll surprise her by dropping it by her classroom today when I pick my youngest daughter up from school! That will be a delightful end to a Friday, don't you think?

Anyway, thanks for reading and responding. I still wonder why I feel the Lord is wanting me to do this. I've stayed away all week because I simply haven't had the time, and I realize I run the risk of losing those of you who get tired of there not being something new posted. But really, I'm doing this blog in response to the leading of the Lord, not because I need a huge readership kind of thing. If this blog helps me to connect with the few of you the Lord desires me to connect with, then that's enough for me. I don't have any desires for being well known in blogland or anywhere else for that matter. I read a few blogs regularly, and I click around to other blogs that I see listed on those sites, and really......I think some women (people) must have nothing other to do than sit around writing posts. Even if I wasn't working, I probably wouldn't post more often because I have a husband and four children who are higher on my priority list than blogging.

Well, I'm off to pick up Cindi's gift card! My blessings to each and every one of us on this beautiful fall day!

My Fine Colleagues

Just thought you might enjoy seeing some of the fine men that I work with. Mr. Tim Tanis teaches Jr & Sr High Art, Design, and Photography. Mr. John Godfrey teaches Algebra I, Geometry, and Consumer Math. Mr. Fast teaches Advanced Algebra, Pre-Calculus, Calculus, and AP Statistics; he is also the Academic Dean. And finally, Mr. Billy Hawes taught English 9 and 11. I'm sure you'll appreciate their professional demeanor.

This took place during a talent show at the end of the school year, and no, that's not their natural hair! I wish I had the video of my daughter, Hannah, singing "Taylor, the Latte Boy," because she did a great job and won the $25.00 prize. Here's the song she sang, performed by the fabulous Kristin Chenoweth, if you are interested. Have Fun!

The Hiding Place

"You are my hiding place and my shield; I hope in your word...Hold me up, and I will be safe..." Psalm 119:114,117

In my 8th grade English class, we are just finishing The Hiding Place by Corrie ten Boom. This is a powerful book about one Christian family from Holland who dared to risk their lives to harbor Jews during the Nazi reign of terror that had invaded their country. If you have areas of your life where you are struggling with forgiveness or with being grateful, this book will speak to your heart. Each time I read through the book, I am struck again by the miraculous journey that Corrie takes from hatred to forgiveness. She endured and witnessed such horrendous things, and her natural responses mirrored what most of ours would be. However, she is contrasted throughout the book with her sister, Betsie, who is able to keep God's perspective through all of the betrayal, punishment, torture, disease, and deadly circumstances. Corrie lost both her father and her sister, Betsie, while they were in the concentration camps. Corrie is eventually released because a clerk mistakenly recorded her number, 66730, on a list of women to be freed, instead of on the list of women her age to be executed.

She went on to establish a home in a vast estate in Holland for people who had either been held in concentration camps or hidden in attics, farmhouses, crawl spaces or back closets for two, three, or even four years. The 56-room home and land was donated to Corrie's work by a woman whose five sons worked with the resistance. Corrie also turned her family's home in Haarlem into a healing place for the Dutch men who had signed on with the Nazi's and betrayed their own countrymen; she saw the anguish they suffered because of their participation in persecuting their own. Corrie then began traveling to speak to groups about the power of God to save and to help heal their raw and broken hearts, and she found the greatest need to be in Germany itself. She helped to turn a former concentration camp into a place of healing for people who had been part of the atrocities committed against humanity. Churches in Germany stepped up and began to minister to their fellow countrymen. Those in the church helped to take away rolls and rolls of barbed wire; they painted the pale gray block buildings the green of new life in spring. They placed window boxes with flowers along the fronts of the buildings. The place of death and torture was redeemed to be a place of hope and healing. The name of Jesus was lifted up as thousands turned to Him in need of forgiveness and healing. Others needed the power of God to be able to forgive and move on with their lives. Corrie was God's instrument of grace, and she lived out her remaining years (until she was 91) sharing God's love all over the globe.

I have a Modesto Bee newspaper article from 1974 which details Corrie's visit to Turlock. She spoke in churches and at the War Memorial building for youth groups in the area. My sister-in-law heard her speak and saved the article all these years. What a treasure to share with my students!

Corrie liked to use props when she spoke, and one of those was a piece of material she called the "crown." She would begin by holding up what appeared to be nothing more than rough blue cloth with tangled knots of gold thread hanging from it. She would then recite this poem by the American hymnist Grant Colfaz Tullar:

"My Life Is Like a Weaving

My life is like a weaving
between my God and me.
I do not choose the colors
He works so steadily.
Sometimes He weaves sorrow
and I in foolish pride
forget he sees the upper,
and I the underside.
Not till the loom is silent
and the shuttles cease to fly
will God unroll the canvas
and explain the reason why
the dark threads are as needful
in the skillful weaver's hand
as the threads of gold and silver
in the pattern He has planned.

Corrie would then triumphantly flip the cloth over to show her audience what God sees: a golden crown on a field of blue! That is what the believer will eventually see of God's plan in heaven, Corrie insisted." (pages 239-240)

That reminds me of a line from an old Carol King song (yes, I know all her songs of old!) that says,
"My life has been a tapestry
Of rich and royal hue."

I'm sure we've heard the analogy before, but it is good to remember that in this life we see only the back side of the cloth. There are knots every where and colors that cross over one another in no particular order, but when we look at the other side, we see what all the mess makes possible - a beautiful tapestry, rich in color and texture. We must strive to remember that our earthly view is not God's eternal view.

There are dark threads in my life, and in the lives of every person I know, that I see no good reason for, but God sees the finished product. And you know what? It's beautiful! We must hold on and believe. We must ask for the power of the Holy Spirit to sustain us. We must surrender to the working of that dark thread through our lives, often into the very core of our hearts, in order for the picture on the other side to be complete.

Anyway, I'm not always so serious in my posts, but my focus has been on this novel and what it is speaking to me personally. If you get a chance, read the book or get the movie. It will strengthen your faith and teach you that love triumphs over all.

I believe that God is calling me and our church to a greater love for Him, for each other, and for those yet to know Him. This book has further stirred that conviction in my heart. I am asking you to step out in faith to follow Him in that path. True love will cost us something, but the returns will be eternal.

Chapel Update

Thanks to all of you who prayed for me this morning. It went better than I expected, even though I didn't follow my notes much. That's okay with me because I hate to feel tied to my notes; it just doesn't seem personal or natural enough for me.

I had shared a few things from my personal life that tied into the scriptures the Lord had given me to share. I had shared that my parents divorced when I was their age in junior high, and one student, a boy whose parents have just separated and filed for divorce, came up to me afterwards. He said with an understanding smile, "Now I know why you gave me extra time on that assignment, Mrs. Larson." He caught on to my compassion, so I think we're on the same page now. I told him he could talk to me anytime, and I pray there is good fruit from that connection.

Another student, a sweet, thoughtful kid who just lost his mom to cancer this summer, nodded ever so slightly at me with his knowing gaze when I was sharing that I didn't understand how God could have let my high school girlfriend die after going into a diabetic coma. She was the only one I knew who truly loved the Lord and lived for Him. She didn't give in to things the rest of us gave into, and she loved everyone, so I wondered, "What's up with that, God?" This student understands those feelings even better than I do. He's already written papers about his mom twice this month. Right now, the students are working on a personal narrative, and of course, he is writing about his mom's struggle with cancer and how it has affected him. Some of the precise details he shares are haunting. Oh, how I pray that through his writing for my class, he will begin to process what's going on inside of him. Please pray for him if you think of it.

I ended by handing out bookmarks (Hey, I'm an English teacher, remember?) with the scripture verses printed on them. Just to make it fun, I included a typo on them! :-) Actually, that's just what happens when you decide to make bookmarks at 11:00 PM the night before you need them! Anyway, I was amazed at how many didn't even notice; in fact, no one noticed before I told them! That says a lot about the editing skills I've tried to teach them, don't you think?

Thanks again for praying. I am now looking for someone to speak the next time chapel is assigned to me, so if your up for sharing with junior highers, let me know! :-)

Back To School Night

I just arrived home from Eric's Back to School Night at THS. We had quite the workout running hither and yon to find all of his classes, and I came home with a plethora of papers which I will file under "Eric's School." I don't know about your house, but I could seriously wallpaper my entire house with all of the paper from course outlines, expectations, school handbooks, and permission slips. So I'll keep all these papers in his folder all school year and then toss them in the blue recycling can come next June.

It was good to hear complementary comments about my son's conduct and participation. His cross country coach praised his recent"kick it in" mentality. We've noticed that ourselves, and I must say, I'm thankful for it! :-)

I am speaking in chapel at my school on Wednesday and find that I'm nervous about it. Mind you, I speak in front of these students in my class every day, and we have a great time together. However, put me in front of a formally arranged room filled with all of my students at one time, plus the administrators and other teachers, and I suddenly feel like I can't do it! I have prayed about what to share, and I feel that God wants me to share on how to develop a more Godly character. I will be sharing a verse that I ponder so often in my life; Luke 16:10 says, "Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much." I want the students to know that even as an adult, I still have to make choices to be faithful in the little things. The are opportunities every day for me to "fudge" on things, or get by without giving my all, or to simply not believe God's promises, but Godly character is displayed when we are faithful in even the littlest of things, most often in the things no one else will ever see. I pray that my students desire to be honest and faithful in what they consider the small things, because those small things are what character is built upon. These kids have been raised in a society that feeds them the lie that, "It won't matter," but some of their decisions and shortcuts are damaging their ability to be trusted with larger things, both in their physical lives and their spiritual lives. Their reputations, their future dreams, and their character are on the line, even as they make their decisions in junior high.

If you think of me, please pray that the Lord will give me His words to speak, and that the Holy Spirit would work in heart of each student in spite of me!