Summer Hiatus

My Beautiful Children

*Pic Removed per K's request.

In an attempt to actually interact with my children, I will be taking a break from posting for the summer.  Unless something truly interesting happens (which, face it,  99.95% of my blog posts have not been about anything interesting), I won't be posting.  I also will not be checking my email regularly; I plan to pick one day a week to check my emails (by then I'll have hundreds, but oh well).  So.......if you would like to contact me, you'll have the old-fashioned choices of either picking up the phone to call me or (horror of horrors) writing me a letter and sending it snail mail.

As I step away, I will be in prayer regarding whether this blog is something that will continue.  I was only doing this blog as a step of obedience to what I felt the Lord was calling me to do two years ago, but I know for certain that His plan for me was NOT to abandon my children as I became more and more addicted to checking my email and keeping up with blogs (both mine and others).  As my children grow and go forth into their lives, they won't remember if I answered every last email or text, or if I kept up with posting or reading the many blogs I've come to enjoy, or if I always had some witty, little saying for my facebook status, or if I cared about twittering, blackberries, instant messaging, or online devotionals.  But my children will remember if I took the time to play that game of Sorry, or to walk to the library, or to read out loud to them, or to visit family, or to swim, or to roast marshmallows, or to just sit down face to face with them and really, I mean REALLY, listen to them.  

I am ashamed to say how long it's been since I've given myself to my kids.  I meet needs (sometimes); I wash clothes and buy groceries; and I'm in the same house with them, but I am not WITH them.  There is great value in being fully present in the here and now, and I'll be really honest and just tell you that that is a struggle for me and how my brain is wired.    I don't care where I am or who I'm with, my brain is going a hundred miles an hour, thinking of anything and everything except just enjoying the current moment.  Lack of engagement (disconnect) is also a part of my battle with depression.  I am praying that the Lord will help me to be able to change and overcome this.  I would covet your prayers regarding this issue.  

I am the only mother that will be standing before God accounting for the training, parenting, and loving of the  four precious children He has given me.  I don't think I will hear "Well done," if I have neglected my husband and children because of my over-involvement with keeping up with emails and blogs.  I am choosing to step out of the technology fast lane (well, with me and technology, it's more like stepping out of the right hand, slow lane on the freeway, but you get the point).  

I am feeling such a sense of empowerment by making this choice, but I also wonder about those who may email me and not get a response right away.  I do not have an "auto respond" with my email address, so I don't know how to let people know I'm not being rude, but that I'm only checking my emails once a week.  I know that others have become accustomed to me checking my emails multiple times a day, but I just don't want to do that anymore.  I think I have "Disconnect Anxiety,"  which is an actual disorder now, I guess.  Click the link for a very interesting article that I just found when writing this post.  I guess the pain of continuing to be chained to my email and computer is more than my worry and anxiety about hurting someone's feelings or missing something important.  

So, my friend, I bid you goodbye for the summer.  If you have children, please join me in evaluating the amount of time you spend being with your kids, but not WITH your kids.  

Thanks for joining me in the journey for these last two years.  I consider it an honor that you have given some of the measured moments of your life to traveling this path with me.  I most earnestly pray blessings, peace, and health for you all.  

In His name and for His glory,

Gena

Oh, and in case you think I'm overstating the case that my family needs me to be more attentive and involved with them, just take a look at this.
*Pic Removed per K's request.

*Pic Removed per K's request.

*Pic Removed per K's request.

Yeah, I thought that would help you understand.  :-)

Hey, you all need to go to the Servolution website and sign up to work alongside of us on May 9, 2009. Seriously, it's not just hype; you won't be sorry you signed up. God is on the move and you don't want to miss it, do you?




Now, on to the reason for this post. I joined Kimba at A Soft Place to Land and will be "unplugged" tomorrow. That doesn't seem like such a big deal, does it? Believe it or not, however, my anxiety level is starting to rise in anticipation of not being able to be on the computer tomorrow. Isn't that the biggest sign that I need to take a break?

I find myself hurrying tonight to take care of some of my business items, to respond to my emails, and to respond to those who've posted on my Facebook profile. I mean, what if someone emails me and doesn't get an immediate reply? What if someone asks to be my "friend" on facebook and I don't "accept" them? Will they think I don't want to accept them? And what if I there is a problem with a business order and I'm not online to get the message?

I think I need to realize that the world will go on just fine if I am not checking on it through the portal of my computer screen. The order that I wanted to get finished before unplugging will have to wait until Saturday to be completed. The emails will wait until I log on this weekend. Facebook DOES NOT need me! The one bright side is that I post so infrequently on this blog that there will be no problem not getting on here tomorrow.

You know what's funny? There are many days that I just don't get to the computer until late in the day if at all, and yet I don't feel the same anxiety that I find myself feeling this evening. I think just knowing that I CAN'T get on the computer is causing my anxious feelings.

This is ridiculous! I am taking a stand! So, goodbye until next time, whenever that may be.

I Really Need to Do This!

Okay, I'm keeping it real here. I've got a problem; I really do. I am on the computer - A LOT! I don't even consider myself a tech person, but with two side businesses and emails (business and personal), I am on the computer more often than I'd like. And don't even mention the wonderful(?) world of Facebook! Sometimes I start getting anxious as I'm on the computer because I know it's time to get off, but there's always one more person to respond to, one more order to enter, one more client to contact, one more person to reach out to through an email. And I thought technology was supposed to make our lives easier and more relaxing! Well, if that's the case, then I've missed the boat!

So, when I read Kimba's challenge, I decided I should jump on board. It seems that I'm not the only person with this problem, and I think Kimba's idea is a great start for putting all things technology in their proper place. I should control the technology in my life, not having technology take control of me. Right? Right!

So, you can see the challenge for yourself by clicking the button below. Let me know if you would like to join us. Perhaps I need to declare a one day sabbath from technology each week. Lord knows that would give me some rest! :-)

Ananlogy Back Knots?

Once a week, I get an update telling me how many people have visited my blog each day. One of the features shows me what people type into a Google search box that brought them to my blog. I run across some funny things sometimes, like the following that brought someone to my blog just this week:

"tapestry ananlogy back knots God."

Now what in the world do those words even have in common and why did Google link to my blog based on these words? And what the heck is an "ananlogy?" I think it must be a typo for "analogy."

Anyway, the other searches that brought people to my blog this week are much more run of the mill. I've listed the most common searches for this week (just because I know how curious you are about this):

traveling together
servolution
poems about traveling together
gena larson
jesus protected me
it's all because of jesus i'm alive
Uppercase Living Modesto
"before he speaks" pastors wives

Isn't your life complete now? :-) Just doing my job passing on interesting (and useless) information. You can thank me later!

Appropriate Reading Level?

I found this "Blog Reading Level" over at another blog site and thought, "I should give it a try.  I am not sure how the reading level is exactly measured or figured out.  Do they take into account all posts, or do they only take the most current post or page?  I don't know, but should it embarrass me that my blog content measures at a junior high reading level?  I prefer to think that I am just trying to be as accessible to all as I can be. I think it also shows how much I submerse myself in the middle school literature genre since that's what I teach! :-)  Those are my good excuses anyway, and I'm sticking with them!  I wanted you to know where I scored in case you are so high-falutin' that you wouldn't possibly want to read something written at a junior high reading level. By the way, high-falutin' is actually in the dictionary, (just in case you were wondering).

Seasons

There is a season for everything, right? I am on vacation (alone with my husband for a week - can you believe it?!), and it has been a brief season of rest and relaxation. It always takes a couple of days for the weight of our "normal" routine to melt away so that we can be "in the moment."

I wanted to let you few faithful readers know that I will not be posting as often (as if you already haven’t noticed that!) because I am headed into the busiest two months of my year. In order to be the wife and mom I need to be, I need to step away from everything extraneous, and my darlings………..blogging is extraneous.

I started this blog (you can read my “Why Do I Blog?” post here) because I wanted it to be a place of interaction and connection. Although many of you read this, the interaction part never got off the ground, so I feel completely at peace in stepping away from something that is taking my time without the benefit of truly connecting with people. I will most likely continue posting after my oldest daughter graduates and I finish my school year, but I’m not making any promises. I trust that the Lord will make it clear if I am to continue.

I get one shot at these last few weeks of my daughter’s high school life, and my three other children will be winding up their school years, also. I am also the only one who can stand before God and answer for the kind of wife I was to David. I want to be found faithful in those roles that were to be the most important in my life.

So, you may check back now and again to see if I've posted, and I promise to post again after school is out (if not before).  

Thank you for checking in with me.  I know that I, apart from Christ, am nothing, but I give Him praise if anything I've shared up to this point has blessed, encouraged, challenged, or uplifted you.  God bless you all!

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” Eccl. 3:1

Post 100 - My Little Random List of Thankfulness

Well, I'm officially at my 100th post, although I have several drafts still waiting to be edited, thought through, or finished.  In honor of my actual 100th "posted" post, I thought I would share some of the things I am grateful for and love.  This is by no means an exhaustive list, and just as sure has I hit the "publish" button, I'll think of other, worthier things I could have listed, but it is what it is. :-D

I am thankful for:

1. A God who loves me enough to have sacrificed his very own son to provide a way for me to be with Him forever.

2. Dave, a husband who is more than I deserve

3. Hannah, my joy

4. Eric, my laughter and hugs

5. Peter, my musical encourager

6. Kari, my precious gift

7. skittles - really!

8. friends who love me, put up with me, and challenge me

9. a mom who set a wonderful example for me of tithing, prayer, and exercise 

10. two very dear sisters - Paula and Tracy 

11. down comforters in duvet covers

12. rainy days

13. mint chocolate chip ice cream

14. five nieces-Sarah, Emily, Alyssa, Kristen, and Abigail

15. two nephews-Aaron and Hugo

16. a dad who loves sunsets as much as I do

17. quietly floating in the pool in the stillness of a warm night

18. comfy shoes, although I don't have too many pairs of those :-{

19. a sister-in-law, Wendy, who takes me to great restaurants in the city and is a great cook

20. flickering candles

21. an artistic sister-in-law, Nancy, whose artwork graces my walls and reminds me to look for beauty

22. the ocean

23. some great Bible studies: Lord, Calm my Anxious Heart;  Strong Women, Soft Hearts; Experiencing God; Breaking Free; Wisdom for Mothers.

24. a quilt my grandmother made me for my 18th birthday

25. Texas cake

26. tissues (truly, what a marvelous convenience!)

27. wonderful neighbors

28. Gingko biloba trees in the fall

29. Godly in-laws

30. a much loved foster daughter

31. continual forgiveness because of God's unconditional love and mercy

32. a car that is reliable

33.  three fabulous brothers-in-law: Dan, Ritch, and Todd

34. neighborhood walks

35. old family photographs

36. yellowed, clipped out, precious Ann Lander's columns 

37. country drives

38. Em Le's waffles

39. reading magazines

40. a stepmom who makes the best pomegranate jelly and has the patience of a saint

41. swinging at the park

42. country drives 

43. naps on Sundays

44. playing football in the street with my family

45. my underlined, highlighted, note-riddled, date-filled Bibles and devotional books

46. a father-in-law who "surprises" me with poinsettas every Christmas

47. my dining room hutch

48. mosaics

49. laughing till I cry

50. lip gloss

51. potatoes-any way you want to cook them

52. summer evening breezes

53. eyelid kisses when I'm not feeling well

54. good spinach dip

55. fresh water to drink

56. my New Life family

57. fun dancing songs

58. notes and cards from Dave - saved from when we were dating until now (I've gots LOTS of them!)

59. Tylenol sinus medication

60. unexpected blessings - that note in the mail, a middle-of-the-night time with God, the "I love you's" from my husband or one of my kids.

61. sleeping in

62. notes in my children's handwriting filled with phonetically correct spellings

63. my laptop computer

64. my students

65. walking along the beach

66. a mom and step-dad who pray for me and my family daily - and specifically

67. hot baths

68. Tide-To-Go pens - what a life-saver!  :-D

69. paper supply and stationery stores

70. Neutrogena Rainbath shower gel - the blue one only

71. sugar-free Hazelnut creamer

72. journals

73. leisurely trips to the bookstore

74. times away with my husband

75. my "hundreds" of cousins :-)

76. Lucy, our dog

77. Fun movies - The Princess Bride, That Thing You Do, the original Yours, Mine, and Ours

78. reading with my children

79. hearing squeaky, out-of-tune instrument practicing

80. Santa Barbara-my favorite California spot

81. homemade citrus ice cream

82. camping with my family

83. birthday lunches with my mom and sisters

84. lunch and coffee dates with friends- chatting the time away

85. being silly with my kids

86. having friends over for summertime bbq's

87. meaningful collages

88. reading before I go to sleep

89. the smell of the road after the first rain

90. eating tomatoes right off the vine

91. hearing my children laugh with one another

92. having Dave sit by me during church, a funeral, or a wedding because he's not speaking

93. hot coffee in the right shaped mug (one that fits perfectly in cold, cupped hands)

94. picnics with plenty of cheese, fresh fruit, and crackers

95. pottery

96. post-it notes (another lifesaver!)

97. irises and tulips

98. a healthy family

99. 4th of July with my extended family

and now for number 100..........

the way David squeezes my fingertips when he's holding my hand. ;-D

Fabulous Friday and a Winner

Even though I've just completed two in-service days at my school site, today has been a great day! I was able to complete the work assigned to us much more quickly than I thought possible. We are revising and updating our course of study curriculum guides for each class, and of course, English covers a lot of territory in different areas: literature, writing, grammar, and vocabulary development. After finishing my course of study guides, I realized again just how much we cover in one year. Sometimes I feel as if we're not making much progress, but over time, we continue to add to our base of knowledge in many areas. I am continually praying that the Lord will miraculously fill in all the gaps, as it is impossible to accommodate all the various learning levels when there are 32 students in a class.

This morning, I spoke with a colleague as we poured ourselves a cup of coffee (always a necessity on in-service days!). This humble young woman oozes the love and spirit of Jesus, and I find myself wanting to be more like Him when I am around her. It was just the two of us in the teacher's room, and as we were finishing up, she suggested we pray for one another. We shared such a sweet time of connecting with God and one another, and I was blessed. It can sometimes seem as if we are all working independently with no real support, but this morning we were supporting one another in prayer, and it made a difference in the rest of my work day. Thank you, dear one, for being a blessing in my life.

Well, my post about leaving a comment so I would know who is reading didn't go so well. There are those of you who have told me you are out there, but you don't want to leave a comment. That's fine, but you weren't entered in the drawing, thus making the odds better for those who did leave a comment. :-) (You know that's a joke, right?!) I wrote down everyone's name who emailed, left a comment, or sent a snail-mail card, and I had my daughter, Hannah, draw one for me. I know there are many fancy bloggers who use a random number generator for their drawings, but I'm not that technically savvy, so I used the old fashioned method of drawing out of a hat (well, make that a bowl).

And the winner is....................Cindi!!! :-)

Yes, she will be receiving a Starbucks gift card, and I think I'll surprise her by dropping it by her classroom today when I pick my youngest daughter up from school! That will be a delightful end to a Friday, don't you think?

Anyway, thanks for reading and responding. I still wonder why I feel the Lord is wanting me to do this. I've stayed away all week because I simply haven't had the time, and I realize I run the risk of losing those of you who get tired of there not being something new posted. But really, I'm doing this blog in response to the leading of the Lord, not because I need a huge readership kind of thing. If this blog helps me to connect with the few of you the Lord desires me to connect with, then that's enough for me. I don't have any desires for being well known in blogland or anywhere else for that matter. I read a few blogs regularly, and I click around to other blogs that I see listed on those sites, and really......I think some women (people) must have nothing other to do than sit around writing posts. Even if I wasn't working, I probably wouldn't post more often because I have a husband and four children who are higher on my priority list than blogging.

Well, I'm off to pick up Cindi's gift card! My blessings to each and every one of us on this beautiful fall day!

Stop By and Say, "Hi!"

I simply cannot count the number of people who have told me this week that they are reading this humble, questionable blog of mine. I knew that there were a few faithful ones who checked in now and again, but I was surprised (and humbled, scared, and awed) by some of those that said they stop by here. So, it got me to thinking, why don't I just ask those reading to leave a comment saying, "Hi!" so I know who's here (and also YOU would know who's here). It's not that I will change what I post based on who's reading, but to be honest, it is a little weird to post things not knowing who is actually reading them. There are a few points of etiquette in Blogland that I've discovered this last year, and one of those points is that it is nice to leave a comment on a blog that you have begun to read so that the blogger has an idea of who is reading and is able to check your blog/profile, also. That doesn't mean you have to leave a comment every time you check in, but it gives the blogger an idea of who is out there. So, I'm asking you to leave a comment after reading this post.

In case you wonder why I'm blogging, click here. The whole reason I titled this blog, "Traveling Together," is that I wanted this to be a way to interact with some of you great people that call New Life Christian Center home. An added blessing is that this blog has helped me connect to others outside of New Life, also. Some I have known, and others are new friends gathered through this modern mode of communication. However, this blog hasn't turned into the connecting point between us that I had hoped it would. It has seemed rather one way, a lecture if you will, rather than back and forth, or a discussion. I simply long for this blog to honor the Lord, and if it honors Him as is, I'm fine with that, but if He wants it to be something more, then that's what my heart desires also.

So, please stop by and leave a comment. To help motivate you, I'll do a drawing from the names of those who comment to win a yet-to-be-determined prize. (That means that I haven't thought this all the way through yet, and I'm just throwing it out there!) (:-)

Also, as something to draw from for future posts, please feel free to email me, or leave a comment, asking any questions that you may have for me that we can discuss.

Why do I blog?

Okay, this question has been ruminating in my mind ever since I wrote my first blog entry. If you know me, then you know I'm not the tech-girl, so although I knew my husband read the blogs of several friends and people in ministry, I had no clue what a blog was. I didn't quite see the sense in putting something out there that just any ol' person could read. I also felt, and still feel, that having a blog might come across as egotistical - Who do I think I am that people would actually care to read about my life and what I am thinking and learning? Well, I recognize the fact that I am nothing outside of the redeeming grace of Jesus Christ and the work He has done (and is still doing) in my life. So, I in no way wish to project the idea that I, in myself, have much to offer. In fact, these postings may be nothing more than my obedience to something I felt the Lord was calling me to do.

So, why do I blog? Well....
1) First and foremost, I felt the Lord was asking me to step out of my comfort zone and risk being vulnerable. I felt that HE wanted me to do this, and perhaps it is not for anyone else, and only for Him. I don't really know, but I do long to honor Him with my life, and do what He's asked of me. I felt that God wanted me to place my trust in him in posting entries about my life because although I don't feel I have much knowledge or many great insights to share, but I do have life experiences that God has redeemed, and I have an all-consuming love for God.

2) I felt that it would be a place where people could get to know me, not that I am anything special. It is a weird thing being a ministry wife, because people do want to know about me, my husband, and my family just because Dave is a pastor. I think there is this secret desire to know if we are just like everyone else. (Just in case you're wondering....we are!) And it's not that I desire to be aloof or distant from anyone, it's just that there are too many people for me to invite everyone over to our house individually so that we can really get to know one another. My heart often grieves over this because I am a person that much prefers knowing a few people well, rather than many people at a surface level. And with the number of people who call New Life their church home, I know many people at that surface level only. God also created me as a person that can only handle so much stimulation before my body and mind go into shut-down mode. I can't, for the life of me, figure out why God would create me that way when He knew I would be a pastor's wife. My personality and a very public role don't seem to go together too well.

3) I felt that a blog, should anyone choose to read it, would help me to connect with people who might not come up to me on Sunday mornings and with other pastor's wives. It has proven to do that already with me connecting with pastor's wives from other parts of the country, with women at New Life that I don't really know, and with women who have struggled with infertility or losing a baby. This has been a most pleasant surprise for me.

So, these are a few of the reasons that I stepped out into the blogging world. I am a private person by nature, so putting myself out there (not knowing who might be reading) is quite a stretch. I don't ever want to violate myself, my husband, or my family by what I share, but I do believe that God wants us to become more transparent in our relationships with one another and to put away the masks. I think this blog could be a part of that.

If you are looking for a pastor's wife, woman, mom, or Christian who is perfect or has all of the answers, please stop looking at this site. I am simply a child of God who desires to live true to God and myself in spite of my blunders, sin, and doubts. Just like I titled this blog, I desire this to be a place where we can come alongside one another as we travel towards Him. So, this is why I blog.

1 Thess. 2:8 "Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God, but our lives as well."